Rule # 3:There is always hope

I get it,

you’re still hesitant to try internet dating

I don’t blame you

then again

the last two stories probably have done little to encourage you.

You’re right,

there are a lot of weird people out there

odds are you’ll end up on a date with at least one of them

Sure you’ll get funny/awkward stories for your friends to laugh at

but is it worth it?

Can you really meet a quality person?

Can you really find love?

Apparently I can’t,

but maybe you can?

This brings us to rule #3 – There is always hope.

Despite my plethora of awkward dates

And slightly embarrassing stories

I still hold firm to the belief that internet dating can lead to something spectacular

even if it leads to numerous misadventures along the way.

So why do I hold on to hope despite numerous experiences to the contrary?

Am I just a glutton for punishment?

Is there some glimmer of hope?

I sure hope so.

I don’t think I’m way off base because I’ve seen it happen

Somehow

two souls adrift on the internet highway

meeting

falling in love

By this September three of my friends

(two of which I met through dating websites)

will have met

fallen in love

married someone they met online.

Sure

they had their awkward experiences

-some of which I’m sure I’ll tell you all about later–

but they persevered and found what they were looking for.

And they’ll tell you it was worth it

-the stilted statements, the awkward approaches and confusing conversations –

they’d do it all again just to find that wonderful person to fall in love with

Not all my experiences have been bad either

Sure, I haven’t fallen in love

haven’t found someone I want to marry

but I have found people just as valuable.

Like Actress

At one point in my illustrious internet dating career I was talking to these three girls at once.

Basketball, Dancer and Actress.

Sorry, some nicknames were more original than others…

My experiences with the three of them couldn’t have been more different. 

One of them quickly blew up and led to one of my awkward stories you’ll end up hearing

One petered off and I never even ended up meeting her

And then there was Actress

She has the honour of being one of the most beautiful (and amazing) women that ever initiated contact with me. 

A couple years ago now

I got an email saying I got a message

I expected the usual. 

Someone who was nothing what I was looking for

who didn’t read my profile,

and sent a one sentence email.

I was wrong.

Checking the site I was shocked to discover a detailed message

from this stunning young woman.

Friendly

Passionate

Energetic

Loves Jesus

Beautiful

Her only downside –

she lives in Toronto

– really, have you tried to drive to Toronto during rush hour? 

It’s not fun

Despite the distance I replied and we quickly took to messaging each other before arranging to meet for sushi.

Trekking into Toronto I get there early

Awaiting her arrival. 

Watching her approach in her cute sun dress I couldn’t help but smile

though as she got closer I realized how much taller I was than her….even in heels

(Clarification: she was the one in heels)

The night went great with both of us competing to see who could talk more.

I think she ended up winning

I left intrigued,

in awe,

and encouraged.

And looked forward to see where this could lead.

We ended up going on a couple of more wonderful dates

where we shared our love of musicals, sushi and Jim Gaffigan

but in time the butterflies flew away

and what remained was deep and beautiful friendship.

To this day I’m glad she messaged me

Glad we went out

Glad to call her my friend.

She’s one of the most caring, fun and greatest friends a guy can ask for

even if she lives in Toronto.

So yes, there are some crazies out there,

Yes, you’ll have to wade through a lot of shit to find someone great

but there is hope.

There is always hope

You’ll have to learn to deal with rejection

As message

After message

After message

Gets ignored. 

I think I have .050 batting average

No that’s not a typo, .05, not .5

As one out of every twenty messages

And that’s being optimistic

But there is always hope

And girls,

you WILL get perverted and highly inappropriate messages.

From idiotic and ignorant guys who don’t understand you don’t treat people like that

You won’t be able to click delete fast enough.

But there are kind and caring gentlemen out there

There is always hope

And that is why you have me

You can learn from my mistakes

glean from them,

to better be able to discern between those that may be worth pursuing

and those that will leave you with nothing more than a story.

Over the next couple of posts I’m going to give advice on how to be able to tell the difference. 

See the warning signs so that maybe

just maybe

you’ll find love

instead of lunacy.